I had just turned 22 years old, I was engaged to Heidi and I was headed back to Alabama from Ricks College for the Summer. As many of you may know, the trip from Rexburg, ID to any of the southern states is long and boring, unless, of course, you have a suitable driving companion. I was fortunate in the fact that a good friend of mine, Sid (due to some recent concerns from someone who will not be named... mom, I was obliged to change the name of this person to protect the innocent. So if you had previous read this post and are confused, that is the reason why,) studying at BYU, needed a ride home and we planned our trip together.
I left out of Idaho early on a Thursday morning and arrived at BYU campus just after 11:00 a.m. When I pulled up to Sid's dorm I was shocked to find him waiting outside with all of his stuff. To say he had a lot of stuff is an understatement. Sid had piled up what appeared to be everything he ever owned. There were more boxes then the actual size of my car.
When I asked him what he was thinking, he told me that he really wanted all of his stuff. I quickly explained to Sid, that all of my belongings were crammed in the trunk and he had enough space for whatever he could fit in the back seats. Sid was depressed, but he agreed to mail some of his stuff home. He then asked me if I wanted one of his sweaters. I really didn't, but he persisted.
"Look man, this is a great sweater and I'm just going to have to throw it away."
With that being said, I convinced myself that I guess I could use one more sweater and I thanked him for it.
When we arrived at the post office to mail a bunch of his boxes and he discovered that the cost was going to be well over $20, he promptly asked me for the money.
"I'm not paying for that!" I said.
"But I gave you that sweater!" Sid said. "It's worth well more than $20." I then remembered that Sid was notorious for pulling tricks like this and I chucked the sweater back into his lap.
"I'm not paying for the postage, pal."
Finally, after what seemed to be an eternity of dickering, the boxes were mailed and we set out on the road with the full intention of not stopping until we traversed the entire 30 hour drive. I immediately discovered that Sid was a terrible driving companion. From the moment we set out on actual highways, Sid slept the entire time. I was forced to entertain myself by listening to the radio and telling myself jokes. After 6 hours of driving, I was getting hungry and I thought it was a good time to switch. We pulled into an Arby's and Sid started driving.
I enjoyed my sandwich and stretched out my legs for what I thought was my chance at redemption. I was going to sleep for the next six hours while Sid drove in silence. After about 15 minutes on the road, however, my plan changed drastically.
I hadn't fallen asleep just yet and I was staring at the map to get our bearings when the car jerked rather forcibly toward the shoulder. I looked up, expecting to see some animal that we just missed and when I looked at Sid he was wide-eyed.
"Whoa, man! Whoa!" Sid exclaimed.
"What happened, did you fall asleep?" I asked almost jokingly.
"Yeah, I did," Sid said, rubbing his eyes violently.
"Don't worry man, I'm awake now," Sid assured me.
I was a little wary, but he seemed to be awake, so I went back to reading the map. After a few minutes we came upon some road construction and the traffic was thick. I just happen to glance up and I noticed that we were inching rather rapidly toward a semi-truck directly in front of us. When I looked over at Sid to see what he was doing, he was out cold! Snoring even!
"Sid!" I yelled, to which he bolted awake and almost ran us off the road. I decided since there was no way in heck I would be getting any sleep while Mr. Ambien was driving, I switched him places and drove for another 6 hours. All the while, Sid slept.
Now it was well past midnight and I was exhausted. I thumped Sid on the arm to wake him up and I asked him if he felt rested enough to drive for awhile. He assured me that he definitely had enough sleep and he took over at the wheel. Unfortunately after about 15 minutes (I hadn't even gotten comfortable in my chair), Sid told me that he was too tired to drive and we were going to have to pull over. This was not what I wanted, but I didn't want to die either.
We found the cheapest motel we could find in a tiny little town and checked in for the night. I was pretty frustrated that I had to shell out an extra $25 of my own money because Sid had narcolepsy. After going to the bathroom, I walked out toward my bed and noticed Sid laying in his bed and watching television. That's not all I noticed. On the floor were Sid's clothes; his shirt, his shorts, his shoes, his... underwear! WHAT?
"Sid what are you wearing?" I asked.
"Oh, I always sleep naked," he said, staring indifferently at the tube.
"Not tonight you don't!" I ordered. Man was I ever glad we checked into a room with 2 double beds. What do they teach youngsters at BYU?
The rest of the trip went rather uneventful although, as you've probably guessed, I drove the entire time. Sid turned out to be a slightly better passenger on the days that followed, sleeping only 75% of the time. Sid if you're out there and reading this, you know that I love you man and it's all in good fun.