I'm sitting in that in-between posts time. You know, I do rants and nostalgic moments, I've done a few book reviews, and I'm constantly gabbing about writing updates and what-not, but I'm going to spend this next couple of minutes and do something off the cuff. It will be incredibly lame, but at least it will be posted for all to see.
Here are 10 quirky things that you may or may not have known about me:
1. I have a pet rat named Zoe. She's white with red eyes and I think she actually knows who I am. I like my rat, but I may have a mouse in the house too. I don't like the mouse. I can't find the mouse and it mocks me... daily!
2. I can twist my left hand completely around in a circle. It makes a great party trick especially when there's that awkward silence where the conversation ends and no one really knows what to talk about next.
3. I've been on national television before for slapping a second-rated WWE wrestler on the back as hard as I could when I was 14 years old. I think I've posted about this before, but I still remember that dude yelling in my face and my hand being covered in his back sweat. It was awesome!
4. I don't like peas. That's not really quirky, but it's true. I hate peas. I'll actually refuse to put them on my plate even when my kids are watching on. What kind of example is that? I know, I'm terrible, but that doesn't mean I'm going to lower my stands and allow those little, round, green pills of poo to share a space on my plate with my taters. I used to swallow them whole just to avoid the taste. I'd still swallow them whole right now if I was left with no other choice but to eat them. Peas = Gagayucker!
5. I own a giant ball of silly putty. It's at least 20-30 eggs worth. It's orange and full of hair and other garbage because it has fallen on the floor a bazillion times. Think about that... I spent over 40 dollars on silly putty. $40 could buy an oil change, a nice dinner for me and my wife, a video game for the children, warm socks for the whole family, several cords of wood in case we need to build a fire, an entire episode of a Rachel Ray cooking show, a (short) day at the spa for Heidi, almost 3 new release movies from Wal-mart, a new cage for Zoe, and the list could go on and on. But what did I buy? Silly Putty. Yep, and I think I need more.
6. I bare the resemblance of the following celebrities: the black-haired Italian dude off of Doogie Howser (and Newsies), the host of Street Smarts, the host of Man vs. Food, Grimace, an unopened can of Hominy, and Smurfette. Bad genes I guess.
7. Jobs I have held throughout my illustrious career: Chicken Dipper, Wood-Glue Scraper, Ice Cream Scooper, Door-to-Door Stupid Video Seller, Shoe Peddler, Human Resourcer, Midnight Sign Sticker-Upper, and Book Manager. Again, I guess these aren't quirky, more like random.
8. I have no feeling in the skin on my elbow. It's weird. If you pinch it, I don't feel it. I'm the only person in the world that has this ability. I sometimes wonder if should use my feeling-less elbows to somehow fight crime. I have a large assortment of capes and masks that could be utilized in this endeavor.
9. Things I'm deathly afraid of (no lie): Hippies (not just any hippies, female hippies... scary!) people crawling at me with their head down and their hair flopping wildly, staircases (more importantly people hiding under the staircases,) Mr. Rogers, Dentists, and Chupacabras. I'm not making this up.
10. Lastly, I like to walk on ice no matter how slippery and dangerous it is. I'll walk on it. If there's one patch of ice in a parking lot, I'll park by it so I can walk on it. I don't know why I do this. I've fallen so many times. I've ripped countless pairs of pants, caused myself injuries on more than one occasion, and dented up vehicles with my head. Yet, I don't care. Sliding on ice is fun. I don't have many victories in my life and so I see that patch of ice as a challenge to overcome.
Thank you for reading...