Random Jabber

Because I have nothing to talk about at the moment. I decided to blog about random thoughts.

• New Vocabulary words I've learned since becoming a father: Binky - I always called it a pacifier, but I was wrong, Ka-ka - Isn't this like a swear word in some foreign country? I'm pretty sure it means the same thing in baby language, Blow-Out - I'm not talking about a flat tire. No, it's much worse. Could you imagine having a blow-out yourself? I think I might pass into a coma if all of sudden there was boom boom zooming up the back of my neck. Tending - Little Bo Peep did this, but babysitters do it as well. Did not know.
• Bad knees make it almost impossible anymore to sneak up on my wife to scare her. My life has grown a little duller due to my rusty joints.
• I have yet to see a Kate Beckinsale movie that I don't find enjoyable. Odd.
• Somehow, some way, I've just got to find a practical use for the pressurized tube at the bank windows. Wouldn't that make a wonderful conversation piece in one's living room. "Oh that? Why that's a diaper launcher."
• If I could have a choice, I would speak with an AustaiEnglirish accent, because that's what it sounds like whenever I imitate any of those countries.
• I think most swear words spawned as a result from slow Internet connections. Even though the Internet has only been around for a few years.
• Sock companies would save a lot of time and money if they just went ahead and made socks with a hole already in the big toe.
• I bought a Blue Tooth so that when I talk to myself in the car, other drivers will just assume I'm fielding a phone call.
• As a funny joke, I think police stations should randomly replace their jail cell bars with easily bendable rubber poles and warn their prisoners that they may have been exposed to radioactive material which could cause strange side effects including super human strength. Then they should taze them once they have escaped.