New Resolution

A thought came to me the other day when I had a scheduled interview with a job applicant. I led the way up the back stairs to my office and invited the applicant to sit down. I then proceeded to wheeze uncontrollably because the flight up the stairs left me literally shaking. Sweat beaded up on my forehead... I got bleary-eyed. I had to apologize to the applicant because I was so out of breath, that when I read the questions for the interview I sounded like someone dying of a bullet wound. I know I've posted before about growing old and being out of shape, but man I'm only 31. Is this normal health behavior? Can there possibly be another "reason for my wheezin" or can this all be linked to my addiction to caffeinated colas and fast food burgers?

Whatever the answer, tomorrow starts a new commitment for me (notice how I didn't say today. Let's be reasonable. I still have to procrastinate.)

So what do I do?

Cardio would require me to run or jump rope or tae bo or disco or whatever it is active people do now a days. I want a gimmick. Something that I can wear under my clothes that vibrates me into shape or uses radioactive chemicals to build muscle. Yeah... I'm a sellout.

I have some weights (light ones) at my house, but I don't have a routine that I do. Plus, whenever I start hitting the weight seriously, I end up with an injury. Not a major one, mind you, but one that makes it real easy for me to blame my lackadaisical attitude on it.

I don't even know how to diet. How do people do it? I have a lot of respect for some of the bloggers I visit that are undergoing diets. I can't stand diet colas. I have a vampiric addiction to red meat (oh burgers...) My wife once had me on a strict fruit diet or something. Talk about a bad idea. Once when I was dating her in college I got on a health food kick that included mountains of bran cereal. That got me running... home after every class. Sorry... too much info. (Heidi wanted me to add a disclaimer that she cooks healthy food whenever I'm under her jurisdiction.)

I'm stumped. I need direction. I know I need to do it for my family's sake, but I need motivation. Is there a better than the rest diet plan? (south beach, atkins, fruit?) Should I run? And if so, where? It seems to me that perhaps I need a destination and maybe a ride to get me home after I made it there. I read somewhere that every pound of muscle burns 25 calories a day. So am I going to need protein shakes, creatine, energy bars, raw eggs, and such?

Or am I just over-reacting? Yeah, I get the fact that everyone should be involved in some sort of controlled diet and activity, but do my symptoms merit a gym membership or a doctor's appointment (which by the way, I hate going to the doctor.)

What are my symptoms?
  • Shaking
  • Loss of breath
  • Fatigue
  • Swearing (What? How did that get in here?)

To name a few... Oh and High Cholesterol, Heart burn and Night terrors. Probably not all entirely related.

I'm actually looking for help. Advice. Moral support, if you will. Whatever you can offer.


Tia said...

Watch the biggest loser (if you don't already), I LOVE that show. It motivates me like crazy. And sign up, pay for, and tell others, you're training for a race. Then you'll have to do it. It's great motivation if you've already paid for it, and if you tell people, they're going to check up on you, and you can't tell them you just gave up, now can you?

Tia said...

Oh, and by the way, DON'T go on a diet. You are setting yourself up for failure if you do. It's a change to your whole way of life that will give you success! Diets don't work.

Frank Cole said...

Thanks for the sound advice. I went out and had a couple of McDonald's combo meals and then started to run. I made it to about the second step on our front porch and collapsed. I woke up 4 hours later in Lehi... Don't know how I got there. Gotta love that HFCS (High Fructose Corn Syrup) :)

Tia said...