7.20.2008

Old Age and its Miseries

I know, I know. Of the few people that actually frequent my blog, there will be some offended when I say how old I'm getting. Yes, I'm only 31 years of age and David Beckham, Matt Damon and Brad Pitt are all much older and are chiseled god-like replica's of Adonis, but hear me out.

Incident #1 - I recently hopped on a neighbor's skateboard for kicks and giggles. I was thinking that I used to ride these things and it should be fun. Little did I know and frankly no one chose to tell me that skateboards are a lot like horses in the sense that they get uneasy when they don't have an experienced rider on board. Mine promptly ejected me and now I have a bruised hip, a bruised big toe and my knee sounds like a stretching rubber band whenever I bend it.

Incident #2 - Words like Cholesterol and High Blood Pressure were reserved for Cheerio commercials. Not any more.

Incident #3 - I used to get men's health magazines for the pretty pictures and now I find more interest reading articles about herbal supplements that make parts of my body stop throbbing.

Incident #4 - I suddenly like Filbert nuts.

Incident #5 - I lose my breath sometimes, mashing buttons on my Xbox 360 controller.

Incident #6 - I frequently use a Nettie pot, I'm familiar with the effects of Ginkgo Biloba and Niacin and I enjoy therapeutic baths with soothing oils. (I highly recommend them.)

My wife says I write to much in my posts, so I will end this now. Maybe I'm having a mid-life crisis, but that would mean that 60 is my drop dead date.

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