4.27.2008

Up against a wall





I've actually been able to pin-point the exact moment when I contract Writer's Blockitis. The instant I submit my work to either an agent or a publisher for review, I shut down.

I've had loads of people try to lend advice and support to help me combat this serious disease, but its no use. I simply cannot write while my work is somewhere being reviewed. When you take in consideration that I am truly content with life while I am hammering away on my keyboard, this is a terrible obstacle.

What do I do?

I need new advice.

Someone once told me that beating away on a punching bag can release tension and therefore allow my brain to relax and function properly. My argument to that is... unless the punching bag is made of drywall, I'll have no satisfaction pounding the leather.

What the heck are you talking about Frank?

Tangent Alert!!!

Why is punching a hole into a wall so satisfying? Don't worry, I'm not a nut job, I don't beat on things for kicks and I've only managed to do it once. My brother actually was thrown through a wall when he stuck his sock in a much larger man's mouth, for reasons he can't quite clearly explain.

But there was something about the way the drywall crumbled and the eggshell paint peeled away revealing a hole in my wall that felt like such an amazing release. I seriously compare it to picking up a golf ball and chucking it down the fairway in the middle of an intense golf match, while several frustrated senior citizens watch bewilderedly from behind, or better yet, slipping up and pretending to "accidentally" swear in the middle of ward council. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about.

Of course, directly following my little outburst that resulted in damaged property I was left with a much more frustrating course of action. I'm sure you could guess it, but I'll tell you anyways: The dreaded trip to Home Depot. I swear their motto should go something like... At Home Depot, you can do it, we can help, but we probably won't.

Anyhooo... back to my problem. I'm at the point right now, where my creativity for writing is at an absolute stand still. Maybe your argument would be that I possess no such thing as creativity and my answer to that would be... well.... I really don't know how to write that gesture. :)

I'm going to close this rant for the day, because like I said at the beginning, I've got writer's block and therefore am justified in not ending my thoughts in a coherent fashion. I'd appreciate any ideas, or cleaver antics you have used to flush writer's block from your system unless, of course, it involves an overly abundant dosage of dietary fiber.

I will leave you with this one piece of advice. Electric fences shock like a mother!

3 comments:

Tristi Pinkston said...

So, here's the thing:

If you can't write while your stuff is being reviewed, why fight it?

Take some time off. Do other stuff you like to do.

Then, when the review comes back and your juice is flowing again, write some more.

Forcing yourself to write produces crappy writing.

Frank Cole said...

Tristi,

I totally agree with you. My writing during the review phase is the worst. I never delete it, just in case I find some value in it down the road, but all in all it's crap.

This blog stuff is kind of fun. Maybe that's my release...

Weston Elliott said...

Two things -

First, if you're going to grab an electric fence, grab your little brother first - the last person in line gets the jolt!

Second - according to my nephew, Home Depot's real motto is
"You can do it, we don't care."

See, you're not alone it the world!