9.08.2008

Tagged

I've never done the tag thingy before, but I've seen it in all your wonderful blogs. Since my wife suggested that I give it a go, I'll do the one about my 6 quirks... this should be easy.

1. I'm very vain. I like to look at mirrors, but I usually end up crying. Not once have I ever said, who is that good-looking fellow? Mostly, I look for zits, and stray whiskers that I missed whilst I shaved.

2. I have anger issues, but I've been able to control them for the most part. Every now and then I almost pass out because of boiled blood. I've been able to pinpoint the source of most of my anger and that's video games and technology in general. I've put holes in walls, wadded up game discs and gnawed on controllers. Once while playing a very stupid sports game I'm pretty sure I blacked out. The other source of my anger is no longer an issue and that was school. I lost all control in class, I couldn't stand homework (it was beneath me,) and I verbally challenged many a professor at Weber State. My favorite release was putting all of my books in my backpack at once and chucking it against a wall... ah memories.

3. I love scaring everybody, especially my kids. I don't know how to play a simple game with them without turning it into a horror-fest. It doesn't matter if I'm playing with action figures, Lego's or stuffed animals, sometime during the activity I'll do something that makes my kids scream out in terror. I've made Gavin's stuffed Cheetah talk to itself, took all of Jackson's Lord of the Rings dolls and placed them on the top bunk staring down at the boys hauntingly and even scared Heidi so bad that she about high-kicked my teeth out. I own countless masks, am pretty good with various demonic voices, and for some reason I instinctively shut the lights off on the kids when I walk in the room.

4. I still run up the stairs after turning off the lights in the basement in fear that someone or something will try to grab my ankle. This probably stems from the effects of quirk #3. I have twisted many an ankle falling down the stairs as I tried to take the steps four at a time.

5. I am very clumsy. I have managed to fall down every single flight of stairs in every single place I have ever lived. I guess that could stem from quirk #4 as well. I once tripped and flung coke all over my father-in-law who was sitting at the bottom of the stairs watching a movie. He seemed slightly miffed when he was forced to wipe the residue from his glasses. I run into walls, I always spill food, drinks, sacrament cup water, etc. on my shirt when I'm eating. I've ripped 6 pairs of pants at work (I work in a book store.) My ankles and knees give out periodically for no good reason and I usually buckle and topple over in front of dignified people. Every major injury in my life can be linked to this quirk.

6. I have night terrors. Oh no, no, I don't simply chat, I am a regular thespian in my sleep. I have ripped clothes, undid light fixtures, moved heavy bedroom furniture, laid a bookshelf filled with books against the bed, chucked pillows at the wall, jumped into the wall like there was supposed to be Velcro awaiting my flailing body, bit my wife, stuck my hands in the ceiling fan going full bore, run into dressers, chased invisible people out the door and down the hall, screamed like a girl at the top of my lungs so that the neighbors might have called the cops, imitated Golem from Lord of the Rings to the point that my sister-in-law started bawling, hawked lugies, removed all of my bedding and threw them into my parents bathroom, removed all of my bedding and blamed it on some Asian guy while I was in the MTC, attacked the smoke detector thinking it was a giant one-eyed spider, and the list goes on and on and on. Yeah I suppose that is a little bit more than just a quirk. Will call it a quark.
So now I've done it... I've done the tag. Now I tag everyone else in da woild!

2 comments:

Meredith's Mommy said...

We had a dental hygenist once who told us she once awoke to her husband frantically feeling the wall, expecting there to be a portal there which would transport him to another dimension. The supposed portal was behind their wedding portrait, which he had removed from the wall and layed on his sleeping wife....

Melissa said...

Love your playlist! I rarely say that to anyone. Your blog is great - hilarious, but I should've known that after all the early Sunday meetings.